Depression as a College Student

By Jawaun Jackson, Contributing Writer

Depression is much more than just being sad, it is a wave of emotions crashing into an unstable rough and rocky shore. Some days are good while others could be sad; some days you can spring out of bed while other days you’re chained to it. However, most times a person feeling depressed just feels like meh.

From my experiences dealing with depression, there is no reaction to most things; it is being in a daze, often being swayed by your emotions in two directions. There is no lightness, it is from one extreme to the other with a responsive medium. It’s mind-boggling to go from waking up happy, bright, and ready to ‘carpe diem’ to ‘leave me alone’ and wanting to stay in this room, on this bed, under these covers until a better day comes. Within the gloomy wave of depression lies the ultimate meaning of ‘going through the motions’: what happens is what happens. There’s little to no emotion with this constant feeling numbness.

For some people it affects how they interact with others, too; it can be like walking on eggshells. You don’t want to be seen as aloof or a complete mess, so it causes disassociation which can make the person even feel worse.  They’ll put themselves on an untouchable island guarded with rows upon rows of mines and Czech Hedgehogs covered in barbwire.

On top of dealing with this condition, students have to still attend classes, sports, clubs, work, and don’t forget about doing homework as well. Imagine the feeling of having writer’s block but it doesn’t go away.  In addition, the depression worsens due to these incompletes and failing grades. It is always an uphill battle when it comes to depression, leaving the person suffering to try to climb out of a hole, with each attempt the hole seemingly to sink deeper.

Fortunately for some there is counseling provided through the university; here at McKendree our Health Services office is more than pleased to provide students with help for all mental illnesses. They are all certified professionals who are here to serve the students of McKendree University.  

Editor’s note: This is a stressful time of year, so please reach out for help if you are experiencing symptoms of depression.  If you are interested in McKendree’s counseling services, please contact health services at 513 Stanton Street, or at 618-537-6503.

One thought on “Depression as a College Student

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  1. Thanks for sharing your experiences with such honesty and candor. I’m sure it will help others to know they are not alone.

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