By Megan Melone
Photography from My Friends from College and eBaum’s World
Do you wake up in the middle of the night and see your roommate and think who is this person? We’ve reached the middle of the semester, and the honeymoon phase between you and your roommate is about over, if it didn’t end a while ago. At this point, most students are experiencing burnout. They’re tired from studying for midterms and are quickly coming to the realization that they have another month and a half of schoolwork and extracurricular activities. In the midst of the exhaustion it can be hard to keep the peace between you and your roomie, no matter how much you like them. Whether it’s clutter, chores, guests or space, you will find something annoying about that person. And that’s normal! It’s hard to live with strangers in cramped spaces and communal areas.
But while the conflict is normal, it does not have to rule your life. Establishing and understanding each other’s boundaries can help foster a healthy relationship with your roommate. The following are some of the most common fights with roommates and advice on how to solve them.
SPACE!
In a dorm there is often an unspoken contract of this is my side and that’s yours, but maintaining these boundaries can be difficult in such cramped quarters where so little is actually yours alone. The little things like closet or desk space seem insignificant but are important when everything is shared. The best way to prevent or remedy disagreements over space is to set boundaries with your roommate and designate what side of the room is yours, what shelf is only for your stuff, what furniture belongs to you and what you are willing to share.
CHORES!
Dividing up chores can be difficult because they are tasks that NO ONE wants to do. Tasks like vacuuming, dusting or decluttering are often the last things on one’s mind but are important. Some roommates may prioritize chores more than another which can result in one person doing all of the cleaning. This can lead to conflict in the living space. The best way to combat this is to designate jobs to roommates or take turns. Have one roommate clean the bathroom one week while the other vacuums, then switch. This system is both fair and organized.
SLEEP!
Everyone has a different sleep schedule. Some rise at 6:00 am while others do not start their day until 11:00 am. It takes all kinds of sleep schedules to run the world, but when varying schedules find themselves in the same room it can be hard to adjust. Living together requires compromise. If one roommate studies late into the night but the other likes an earlier bedtime, then a compromise is required to decide when to turn the light off. Night-owl roommates can compromise by studying in the library or the Hub while the other roommate heads off to sleep. Communication between you and your roommate is necessary to decide what compromise works best for you.
Rooming with others is a great experience that comes with so many positives, but it can also be very challenging. Finding the right balance through communicating your needs with your roommates is the best approach to keeping the peace within your dorm.
